I don't have much free time to blog but I thought I'd give it a shot since I don't keep a diary anymore, and I feel like it might be therapeutic for me.
I am a 30 yr old mother of 3. Ezra is my oldest, he's eleven. My second baby, Olivia, is seven. Then there's Frog Belly (Violet) she was born Dec. of 09 and is about two and a half months old now. I don't have my older children full time so it's nice to be able to be a full time stay at home Mama to Violet. This little girl saved my life, as did her Daddy. I quit smoking when I was about 6 wks pregnant with her and sure am glad I did. My Mom has terminal cancer from smoking and the women in our family are very much genetically predisposed to it if we smoke. So in a sense, Violet did save me. In more ways than just that though. Her smile brightens even the darkest of moments I can get into with feelings of guilt that I carry. Guilt that I will explain in later entries because at the moment I am in a pretty good mood and don't wish to ruin it..lol.
I am a couch potato. I'm not in the best of physical shape at the moment but am trying not to eat brownies more than once a month now...I look forward to my hot shower every day when my Husband finally gets out of bed and can take care of the baby. He works graveyard right now but will be working swing soon and I'm pretty excited about it. I have wanted us to go to church as a family for a long time now and now we can! I am really looking forward to putting Violet in a pretty little dress for her confirmation. In my belief when a baby is small the parents go in front of God and the church and promise to always try to set a good example for the child and raise them to know the Lord. Then when they are old enough to know right from wrong they are Baptised or whatever you wanna call it, I'm not Baptist. I'm non-denominational.
Anywho....
I have struggled with depression and anxiety for many years. About 15 to be exact. I refused to take anything during my pregnancies for it. I recently got back on something though and am feeling much better after only 5 days. I know they say it takes 2 wks or more but whatever, I feel better. I'm not a fan of how spacey it makes me though. My days seem kinda quick and foggy now but I kinda like that too. I just try to do my best to soak up every second of my baby as I can because I know one day soon she will be annoying and not as cuddly anymore..lol.
I forgot to mention the wonderful man I am married to. He's quirky, loving, sweet, strong, funny, grumpy, temperamental,serious, hard to read at times, stubborn and hard working. He loves me and all my mood swings. He may not like me at times but will always and forever love me to no end. He's made me a better person and I love myself a little more these days than I did before we met.
Well I should quit for now. I am going to attempt a shower before the wee one wakes from her evening nap.
Until next time.....
Take life one breath at a time.
No comments:
Post a Comment